What not to say.

All the following statements were said directly to sufferers who follow my Instagram. ‘I mean you aren’t as bad as the PROPER anorexics, you know the people who are really scary thin”. ‘It’s just a phase’ ‘You’re not that skinny’. ‘You know there are children actually dying from hunger in Africa? You’ve not got a…

Nothing tastes as good.

There is something to be said about the way skinny feels. I’m still drawn to the sickening thrill of wearing clothes that sport the label ‘9-10 years’. The way jumpers would hang off my shoulder blades and I could see outfits growing as my shrinking body wasted away in their corpses. The fact I could…

How to help somebody who is struggling.

I got a message the other day, from somebody asking how they could help or support somebod who was struggling when nobody else really knew. The whole thing stumped me a little bit. I usually take any oppportunity to offer advice, as I have a whole load of little bits and pieces of experience and…

How to notice.

Mental health problems aren’t existing as metaphorical movie references. That’s not real life. They’re not whispered secrets to friends, cold meals left at lunch. You’re never going to find the answers protruding from the cracks of  their wrists. So how can we notice,  if there is nobody screaming the truth from a window or stringing…

Everybody knows somebody

With NEDAW fast approaching, I thought it would make sense to post something in line with the whole idea of spreading awareness, and everything else the next week will undoubtedly involve. I am a huge believer in spreading awareness about issues that are seen as ‘taboo’, but it can cause a lot of anxiety in…

I am healing.

Healing is an art. It takes time. It takes practice. It takes love. – Pavana These wounds are finally starting to clot. The bruises are fading – purple embellishments slowly disintegrating. The twisted metal stuck deep in my flesh is finding it’s way to the surface – it hurts like hell, but I know it…

To the girl I was then.

When I was three years old my hair started falling out. Perhaps a humorous foreshadowmnet of the events that would entangle my family in several years time – but more medically correct, it was due to stress. If that wasn’t a warning flag to my mental instability, then who knows what was. I mean three…

Dear Change4Life

I was sitting by myself, finishing my evening snack, which I often struggle with, watching some crappy TV show to take my mind off of the overthinking as I threw the wrapper of my protein bar in the bin. I’m not great at watching TV; I tend to half listen in while I check my…

How to thrive

How to thrive like the beautiful bean you deserve to be. Eat whatever the fuck you crave. A pint of ice cream? Cheesy pasta? Grab your fork and dig in. If you’ve just eaten five meals and are still hungry – then eat something else. Listen to your body. If you’re hungry, physically or mentally,…

A fucked up society.

The stifling smoke of this world’s morality burning up in flames is starting to fill my lungs and labour my breathing. I know I’m not alone in feeling this – there is so much damage everywhere, maybe our minds are slowly developing an immunity to recognising it. The way your brain blocks out certain voices,…

My Christmas Checklist

Hello my loves, sorry for not being the most active in regards to blogging, everything’s been a bit hectic but I am suddenly in a very festive mood as Christmas is fast approaching. *Excited festive squeal*. So I decided to sit down this evening and write a Christmassy little blog for you all, watching a…